If there was ever a time where it was difficult to be an American, it's now. The only time, in my 31 young years ;), I remember it being so difficult was when I studied abroad in Italy, when Bush was in the White House. Any non-American, I kid you not, would scream words or show obscene hand gestures my college + sheltered mind was unprepared for, simply because I "looked" or "sounded" American. Disrespectful, hurtful words + gestures.
Why? Because, apparently, one person represented all Americans. One person's values—one, individual person in power's values—were matched with mine. At that time, I was misinterpreted by the one in charge of our country.
And now, it’s happening again with our president-elect.
Walking into work on Wednesday, I was greeted by adults shaking their heads at me {as if our country's decision rested solely on my shoulders}; international students crying, some even screaming out in the halls that the world was on the brink of a nuclear war {these kids just break my heart}; adults hoping “we” were not going to bomb “them” {yes, someone said that to me at work, and I just.can't.even...}; colleagues giving me sympathetic, puppy dog eyes as if I were no longer a hardworking teacher but an embarrassment who just unfortunately sits next to them {very hypocritical if you ask me when Brexit happened a mere 5ish months ago, but I will not throw stones, I will not throw stones}; and inquiring minds questioning if I will seek citizenship in England {I have to laugh at this one because clearly they don't know me very well}.
I texted my friends on Wednesday saying I just wanted to crawl into a hole {I’m sure many others felt this way} so people would stop asking me “What happened, Danielle?” I almost called in sick to avoid it all together. Heck, even today, running errands, I was nervous people would hear my very thick American accent and misjudge me.
However, this time, when I’m more mature {I’d like to think} and knowledgeable about the world around me, I refuse to let one man's misogynistic, homophobic, racist {the list can certainly go on...} words {because, after all, they’re not “just words”} represent me + my values.
Am I disheartened about what could have, should have, would have been for the next four years? Am I discouraged that America wasn’t ready for a female president? Am I unnerved by the current divide in our country? Yes, yes, and hell yes.
And yet, I repeat: I cannot allow Trump’s views represent mine, especially when living abroad. So how do I avoid this? How do you avoid this? How do we avoid this?
Complaining at nauseam regarding the outcome of the election isn't going to help me, you, or us move forward. And further, attempting to predict the future {especially if the future is predicted to be bleak} of Trump's reign based on ugly, degrading words of the past isn't going to help me maintain a positive attitude + clear mind.
I cannot {and you, who have now followed my long rant to this and agree with me, cannot} be bogged down by the criticism from around the world and within our own country. Now isn’t the time to point fingers at one another. Now is not the time to attack one another and renounce America. Hate-filled words {though I've said + thought many} are not going to change the outcome of an unprecedented election nor is it going to fight those filled with hate.
So, yes, if there was ever a more difficult time to be an American, it’s now—both at home + abroad.
BUT, if there was ever a time to be more proud of being an American, it’s right now, as well. We are a nation who can speak freely {thus this blog post ;)}; we are a nation who can make extraordinary changes; we are a country of people with diverse backgrounds, ethnicities, and because of that, perspectives {and despite current beliefs, that is an amazing, truly amazing characteristic of America}; and we are a country that can put all of our minds and different perspectives together to be great.
And that, right there, is what makes me proud. That’s what makes me not want to crawl into a hole or mask my accent {or God forbid, pretend to have another accent *ahem Lindsay Lohan*}.
Despite my sadness regarding the outcome of a historic election, despite my fear for the future, and despite the negativity + hate, I cannot allow one person to define all Americans and likewise, I cannot let myself be caught up in all the negativity + hate. I, we, all Americans, need to rally together, hold our heads high, and move forward--together. Because, remaining united and kind to one another is the only way in which we can go on gracefully, as the whole world watches us {#teamamerica #lovetrumpshate}.